now i have really dead eyeballs
and maybe dead heart
i cannot believe humans words
especially like someone wants me or like me or good things about me
i think me is good
only when i am alone
i never can believe i am good or like that to others
but i try to believe to my person
i cannot be treated good because i am not good
if i am good i could be treat good
but if i am fugly and gross and say what i want
all would tell me what this fugly shit saying
i feel so
but i say
but i know i shouldn't say because of my fugliness
but when i am alone
i can like myself more
and can think me deserves more good thing for myself
and have more kindness and warmness and sweetness from my person
and it is my world